Healing is a journey that many of us are on. We start a path of self development in one form or another - whether it’s health, or business, or books - which takes us so far until we realize that we can’t just do the right things to move forward, we have to let go of the sabotaging things inside of us that makes moving forward hard or next to impossible. And so, we start to want to heal.
I always use the example of burning rice on a pot. You know when you burn rice on a pot, like really burn it on there? When you have to clean it the first layer of rice comes off pretty easily. Soak in it a bit of water and you’re good to go. But the deeper the layers, the harder and harder it is to come off. Until you’ve got that wire scrubby and you getting the tiny black spots off the bottom of the pot. Healing...is like that. The stuff at the surface is easy to see and easier to come off and it’s a huge win when it does. We get a sense of accomplishment and our life gets better! Whether it’s sleeping better, having better health, better relationships, better self worth. And that’s great! But if you keep looking at the pot (you) you start to see that there’s more. So you dig a little deeper. The next layer of rice is harder to take off. It’s stuck on more and requires more effort. And less comes off at a time and so it’s WAY less satisfying. That’s where a lot of my clients are, somewhere in the deeper layers of healing, but not yet at the bottom.
So what is healing?
I call myself a healer but truly for lack of a better word. I do not heal anyone. I am trained in healing modalities. I clear energy, I activate structures in a clients aura, I flow light to the body for better health, I’m basically an energy mechanic. But YOU are the car. Healing brings up stuff for you to look at. For you to have clarity on. For you to realize that you have a choice and can choose something better. Healing is a tool of empowerment. You, in fact, are your own healer. I simply facilitate the process and hold space for your growth. (Now lets be clear, Mystery School healings are freakin awesome!!! But they only stick if YOU do the work.)
How do you heal?
Healing is forgiveness. When a healer like me does work on you, or you’re doing a class like the Universal Kabbalah or the Healers academy, it brings up something deep in your consciousness to look at. It brings clarity and awareness, and when you have those things you can change if you want to (not everyone actually wants to change because often times we benefit from our suffering). When this stuff comes up there is only one way to heal...to forgive.
”What? Sarah, how can it be that easy?” It’s not easy, but it is simple. The root of all healing is forgiveness. In most cases you need to forgive yourself. In some cases you need to forgive others and in very rare cases you actually need forgiveness from someone else. But THAT is all that healing is.
“But Sarah that makes no sense. You did Ensofic Ray healing on me and it took away all the pain from my back. You healed me.” No. I just flow really good energy and Ensofic Ray is an incredible modality. As in this example, back pain can come from a hole in the aura. The hole in the aura could be caused by a trauma, in this case let’s say abuse from a parent. The hole could have been fed by your thoughts, such as I’m not good enough, I don’t deserve love. And over years of not addressing the real issue, the hole got so big it grounded itself in your physical body, the spine.
In this case, I flow healing energy to spine for miraculous healing, and yes the pain goes away! But if you do not forgive your parents for their abuse and yourself for all the mean things you said to yourself, the pain will come back or manifest somewhere else. Remember, healing is about empowerment! Not someone doing it for you.
So you need to go deep inside and see who and what you need to forgive, and it’s most always yourself.
Why does healing never feel done?
Healing never feels done because it isn’t...not for a really really long time, if ever. Even the best swordsmen or athlete in the world may be 99% perfect, but will spend the rest of their career working towards that last percent. Healing is about layers. What I’ve noticed is that we are given something to heal that makes us strong enough to deal with the next thing to heal. It’s like video games. If you are 100 years old like me and had Donkey Kong on Super Nintendo then you’d know that if you jumped right into the final level you’d lose every time. You need to beat all the levels before it to build the skills you need to win the game. Healing is the same. It comes in stages. Healing is freedom. Let me say that again. Healing is freedom!!! The more you forgive yourself and others, the less attachment you have. The freer you are to be and express who you are, the freer you are to create miracles in your life.
How do I forgive?
This is an individual journey that only you know. And what you’ve done before may not work in the future. You need to constantly be evolving and learning about yourself to heal. But here are some suggestions to get you started.
#1 - Work with someone.
We all have blind spots. This is where the healing needs to take place. We cannot see our own blind spots and need someone to be strong enough to show them to us. We may not like hearing about them, but we need to. My Guide is Christina Lozano. She’s an angel. Strong and wise, and she is an example of what doing the work looks like. She inspires everyone. My Guides are also others teachers in the Mystery School like my Ritual Master Teacher, Ipsissimus Dave Lanyon. The man can see my blind spots every single time. He nudges me in the right direction, or throws me wayyyy off course, so that I can see them. Whether you choose a healer, a spiritual Guide, a therapist, a martial arts instructor, whoever, make sure you trust them and that you see that what they preach is yielding good and positive results in their life. If they inspire you, then work with them. Healing for you will happen much much faster.
#2 - Don’t run away from negative emotions.
Now, I’m not sayin to drown and escape into your emotions and indulge in them all day long. No, I’m saying don’t run from (and ultimately suppress) uncomfortable feelings. They are massive clues for you. Does someone upset you? Why do they upset you? Who does this person actually represent to you? Tell yourself the truth. Once you can feel the emotion and express it - like journaling, drawing, running, talking to a friend - then you can have clarity. Journal or meditate on where it comes from. What’s the root? Then work on forgiving yourself for it. One little piece at a time.
#3 - Don’t make the wound deeper.
Say “I’m sorry” and “I forgive you” in your every day life. If someone upsets you, talk calmly to them about it. Assert your boundary. Tell them how you feel. Let them say I’m sorry. And then when you feel heard and the issue is resolved, say I forgive you and mean it. If you can let the negative emotions go after the talk you know that you’ve dealt with the feelings and that they are not tied to something deeper. And say I’m sorry also. It’s important.
#4 - Be gentle on yourself without being lazy, and be tough on yourself without being cruel.
Healing requires you to be both merciful and severe with yourself.
So what is healing? It’s a journey. The path is forgiveness and the direction is to Know Thyself.
Do not not shy away from negative emotions. Be strong. Work with a healer of some kind. Know that you’re not alone. Know that every little bit of healing you manage to do makes your world and the world around you a better place.
Thank you for your service to self. I hope that this helped.